The other day, my mom and I were driving somewhere when an interesting story came on the radio [FYI: my mom only plays NPR and Christian music when she's driving us kids somewhere, because she wants to balance out all that "stuff" me and my sister's listen to---funny, right?]. The creator of Nip/Tuck, Ryan Murphy, was talking about his newest show, Glee, and even though I ardently admire all things show choir related [I kind of wish Georgetown had a show choir...that would be awesome], his aside on Nip/Tuck and plastic surgery's decreased popularity caught my attention.
Murphy claimed that he created Nip/Tuck to present the ugly reality of plastic surgery through brutally realistic recreations of surgeries; he wanted to demonstrate that artificial physical alterations only speak to deeper psychological problems that only proper counseling can fix. The show first aired at the boom of plastic surgery in 2003 and is closing at what Murphy argues is a time when plastic surgery is not nearly as popular. He contributes this demise of sorts to the rise of less invasive procedures [botox, lipodissolve, and other nonsurgical alternatives]. While Murphy applauds this shift [after all, it's just stupidSTUPIDstupid to go under the knife for an unnecessary surgery], I don't know if I am quite as thrilled.
While plastic surgery is admittedly stupid, it at least requires people to think about their physical alterations significantly more than a botox injection or lipodissolve requires. I mean, getting any kind of invasive surgery like liposuction or a face lift requires multiple doctors' appointments, consultations, and overall health evaluations; any kind of non-invasive procedure doesn't require this. Rather, such procedures simply allow people to immediately satiate frivolous desires, thus exemplifying society's general problem of focusing too much on temporal pleasures that never lead to true happiness--it's just an easier way of doing something relatively bad.
Of course, women are the most frequent culprits of using medical procedures to alter their physical appearance. Most women want to present themselves as the best people they can be [I, of course, have no problem with this desire; women should want to be proud], whether it be in clothing, makeup, physical fitness, etc. However, plastic surgery, or any kind of surgical physical alteration, in my opinion, is a show of weakness. It's just a way of avoiding dealing with your truest person and openly admits that you are not happy with who you are; rather than demonstrating a lady's pride in herself, it discloses disappointment.
These procedures serve as ways of avoiding dealing with the deepest sense of self by becoming, physically, something you truly aren't. It is admittedly easier to go into a doctor's office for a 10 minute botox appointment or a one hour lipo-dissolve session than it is to face your innermost concerns. So, these noninvasive procedures simply encourage continued ignorance of the real problems at hand; they make it easier to be something you're not. And for this, I almost hate botox more than breast augmentations.
Women are better than these procedures. Women have the self-control and ability to improve themselves without any kind of medical method. Supermodels and movie stars should no longer serve as standards of beauty [Come on, we all know about how stupid those people are thanks to the tabloids]. By turning to medical physical alterations, ladies are just selling themselves short and admitting to stereotyped weakness; it shows an inability to fully embrace and love being the woman you are lucky to be.
Now I'm not saying women should lay around and not do anything to deal with any perceived physical shortcoming. I just think individual women should utilize their personal strengths to improve themselves, whether it be through going to counseling, surrounding themselves with people who help them feel as beautiful as they truly are, or even new workout regimens. Injections and surgeries will never make you feel truly beautiful, only life filled with appreciation and gratefulness can do so.
Yes, it is understandable for every person to express some kind of unhappiness with regards to physical appearance. Yes, it is understandable to want to "fix" whatever you deem wrong. This being said, it is not understandable to put yourself at risk for "fixing" things that need not be fixed [under normal circumstances, no one needs a butt implant, no one needs a breast augmentation, no one needs rhinoplasty]. Doctored physical alterations, whether invasive or not, simply fail at trying to resolve deeper unhappiness. After all, I personally think that women should be proud that they are aging, women should be proud to physically show all that they have overcome whether young or old. Why on earth would you want to pretend that your life has been less than it is? Why would you want to ignore symbols of hardships you've overcome? Why would you want to eliminate physical manifestations of memories? Why would you want to hide wrinkles that represent a lifetime leading to greater wisdom? In my opinion, it is these physical markings that make a woman most beautifully feminine [plus, you just look silly (and somewhat unattractive) when you try to be something you're not].
Women are not barbie dolls--we are human. We get scars, we get wrinkles, things sag...we get old. That's life. Ladies just need to accept the reality of things and stop trying to turn themselves into seemingly everlasting beings.
29 May 2009
10 May 2009
Man Skirts: Femininity gone terribly awry
Upon arriving in Saint Louis, I saw a man wearing combat boots paired with a pleated, knee-length, khaki skirt. At first glance, I thought I must have been seeing things. At second glance, I thought he must have been a cross dresser. At third glance, I decided he must have just been a guy wearing a woman's skirt. At fourth glance, I realized, "O boy. This is a legit guy wearing a legit man skirt...whatever that may be." [I would have looked a fifth time, but I was toting too large a bag to do so]
I heard of the "man skirt" phenomena. But I thought it had only touched the upper-echelon of fashion; that is, I thought it had never made it past the runways since Marc Jacob's obsession with them became made obvious in his collection. Apparently, this is not the case. The man skirt trend has even reached Lambert Airport [scary, right?]. While part of me wants to say, "Skirts are comfortable, and, hey, if girls can wear trousers, guys should be able to wear skirts," the larger part of me SCREAMS, "Men in skirts just look stupid and like they're trying to be something they're not." [This being said, I find traditional kilts acceptable in the proper setting.]
For me, this man skirt phenomena puts the issue of total gender equality in a new light. It's one thing for women to take on more masculine fashions, but it is a completely different thing for men to take on female fashions. Is trying [I say trying, because I think it will fail...miserably] to make skirts an acceptable and normal part of guys' wardrobes a way of respecting femininity or actually taking away from femininity? I'm sure that designers would all say that it's about the clothing, the movement, the fabric, and that there should be no gender discrimination when it comes to fabulous clothes. I, however, feel that men stealing away skirts [however ridiculous they look] from being solely feminine is just a way of further asserting male dominance rather than a way of respecting femininity. When a woman wears a properly fitted pant suit and blouse, she looks undeniably feminine because it can be cut and shaped in such a way to accent her feminine figure. When a man wears a skirt, he looks like he went into his overweight grandmother's closet and pulled out something that he thought would provide a nice breeze of sorts.
Man skirts, therefore, do not demonstrate any kind of respect for femininity. It simply mocks it. I'm sorry---you can't make a skirt look masculine. Society is ingrained with the idea that skirts are feminine, and trying to make skirts a male fashion trend just emphasizes recent notions of eliminating the idea of true femininity. You cannot create equality by having all feminine characteristics sucked into male trends to make them acceptable. Not at all. Likewise, you cannot create equality by having all male trends sucked into the world of women. We must learn to embrace differences, embrace men and women as separate, and respect each other. We must accept the skirt as feminine and find it beautiful as such, not needing to be embraced by men to be completely acceptable.
Forcing the breakdown of visible gender differences, like by having men wear skirts, will only create a facade of solution. Truly, we must learn to embrace femininity and masculinity as separate, but equal, entities. We can't create true gender equality by lumping the two genders together----that just yields one visible gender, not equality.
Thus, women need to embrace being women, and men need to embrace being men. That's why I think it is extremely important for ladies to look back to times when femininity was at its prime for inspiration; they shouldn't look to today when femininity is twisted and rejected by many for the purpose of allowing feminism to endure. True feminism can't exist if we take a centrally humanistic perspective; we must take a uniquely feminine perspective.
Hence, I blame Marc Jacobs for contributing to society's brutal attempts at eliminating femininity's existence [I also blame him for making attractive male models look like idiots on the runway].
Let us keep skirts to ourselves, Marc!
I heard of the "man skirt" phenomena. But I thought it had only touched the upper-echelon of fashion; that is, I thought it had never made it past the runways since Marc Jacob's obsession with them became made obvious in his collection. Apparently, this is not the case. The man skirt trend has even reached Lambert Airport [scary, right?]. While part of me wants to say, "Skirts are comfortable, and, hey, if girls can wear trousers, guys should be able to wear skirts," the larger part of me SCREAMS, "Men in skirts just look stupid and like they're trying to be something they're not." [This being said, I find traditional kilts acceptable in the proper setting.]
For me, this man skirt phenomena puts the issue of total gender equality in a new light. It's one thing for women to take on more masculine fashions, but it is a completely different thing for men to take on female fashions. Is trying [I say trying, because I think it will fail...miserably] to make skirts an acceptable and normal part of guys' wardrobes a way of respecting femininity or actually taking away from femininity? I'm sure that designers would all say that it's about the clothing, the movement, the fabric, and that there should be no gender discrimination when it comes to fabulous clothes. I, however, feel that men stealing away skirts [however ridiculous they look] from being solely feminine is just a way of further asserting male dominance rather than a way of respecting femininity. When a woman wears a properly fitted pant suit and blouse, she looks undeniably feminine because it can be cut and shaped in such a way to accent her feminine figure. When a man wears a skirt, he looks like he went into his overweight grandmother's closet and pulled out something that he thought would provide a nice breeze of sorts.
Man skirts, therefore, do not demonstrate any kind of respect for femininity. It simply mocks it. I'm sorry---you can't make a skirt look masculine. Society is ingrained with the idea that skirts are feminine, and trying to make skirts a male fashion trend just emphasizes recent notions of eliminating the idea of true femininity. You cannot create equality by having all feminine characteristics sucked into male trends to make them acceptable. Not at all. Likewise, you cannot create equality by having all male trends sucked into the world of women. We must learn to embrace differences, embrace men and women as separate, and respect each other. We must accept the skirt as feminine and find it beautiful as such, not needing to be embraced by men to be completely acceptable.
Forcing the breakdown of visible gender differences, like by having men wear skirts, will only create a facade of solution. Truly, we must learn to embrace femininity and masculinity as separate, but equal, entities. We can't create true gender equality by lumping the two genders together----that just yields one visible gender, not equality.
Thus, women need to embrace being women, and men need to embrace being men. That's why I think it is extremely important for ladies to look back to times when femininity was at its prime for inspiration; they shouldn't look to today when femininity is twisted and rejected by many for the purpose of allowing feminism to endure. True feminism can't exist if we take a centrally humanistic perspective; we must take a uniquely feminine perspective.
Hence, I blame Marc Jacobs for contributing to society's brutal attempts at eliminating femininity's existence [I also blame him for making attractive male models look like idiots on the runway].Let us keep skirts to ourselves, Marc!
29 April 2009
The newest bane of my existence...
GLADIATOR SANDALS
They are ugly ugly UGLY. The ones that go up your leg look like trellises [ladies, trellises are for gardens, not your feet]. Even the tamer gladiator sandals that are only bondage up to your ankle are ugly. Beyond being hideous, gladiator sandals prove extremely impractical if you buy the genuine ones with all of the laces and buckles...and if you buy the FAKE gladiators with eazy-zipper backs, you just look silly and lazy [if you're going to give into an ugly trend, give in completely].
They are such atrociously masculine shoes. They are unattractive with all clothing items and make ladies' legs look like tree stumps with distorted vines growing up them. O, and the stiletto gladiators are the worst [they are completely stupid].
Why on earth would ladies want to wear shoes traditionally worn by men who slayed lions? I understand that women want to assert their feminine power in their wardrobes, but I really don't think wearing gladiator sandals is the way to do it. It just makes girls look silly and like male gladiator-wannabes, which undermines the goal of asserting any sort of feminine power. Ladies should wear nice, simple sandals and pick out smart clothing pieces instead.
Unless you're on your way to slay a lion, gladiator sandals are unacceptable. Period.
Feminine? I think not.
Chic? Heck no.
They are such atrociously masculine shoes. They are unattractive with all clothing items and make ladies' legs look like tree stumps with distorted vines growing up them. O, and the stiletto gladiators are the worst [they are completely stupid].
Why on earth would ladies want to wear shoes traditionally worn by men who slayed lions? I understand that women want to assert their feminine power in their wardrobes, but I really don't think wearing gladiator sandals is the way to do it. It just makes girls look silly and like male gladiator-wannabes, which undermines the goal of asserting any sort of feminine power. Ladies should wear nice, simple sandals and pick out smart clothing pieces instead.
Unless you're on your way to slay a lion, gladiator sandals are unacceptable. Period.
Feminine? I think not.
Chic? Heck no.
24 April 2009
Would you like some cheese with your whine?
I remember my mom once explaining to me that she had hoped she'd have all boys: 1) because she only had brothers and, therefore, had a better idea of how to raise boys and 2) because she thought girls whined too much [as fate would have it, my mother was blessed with 3 somewhat challenging daughters]. At first, I was slightly offended and said, "O, come on, Mom, I don't whine." My mom just gave me a look, and I soon retracted my claim: "Okay, maybe I do whine sometimes."
It is simply a fact that girls whine and complain [at least I do]. Now, I'm not saying that this is a trait only found among females...guys do their fair share of whining as well. The fact of the matter is, though, complaining is a trait much more associated with girls than guys. Why is this? Well, one argument is that it brings attention, and most girls very much enjoy attention [very true]. Another argument is that girls really are just cranky and unhappy [not so true in my opinion]. And yet another argument is that girls don't understand really how else to get their opinions across in a world that has historically denied women any strong voice with which to take a stance.
I tend to think that the reason is a combination of the first and last ones I mentioned. Undeniably, complaining does bring about attention, but I think that complaining for attention should be characteristically associated with girls in their younger years. Growing up with two sisters, complaining about things was an easy way to get my parents to listen to me amongst the never-ending competition to see who could get the most attention [that is, until my parents caught on to my game]. As girls grow into young ladies, I think this childhood cry for attention at a baser level evolves into a more mature cry for a voice in a society that, to many, may seem very misogynistic. Whining and complaining seemingly becomes the "only" way for women to have their voices heard. And I, personally, feel that this expression of complaining/whining as the only mode for change is actually embraced by some extreme feminists who choose to make claims like, "If you're not angry, you're not paying attention." The reality is, though, that such feminist behavioral beliefs undermine genuine concerns and only help support the stereotype of girls being annoyingly whiny.
If women really want to be heard, they will speak rationally and not uphold stereotypes [such as, "women are whiny bitches"]. Ladies need to take a lesson from our male counterparts and stop complaining about things all the time. If you complain all the time, the world soon becomes a terrible place to be because you only see what's wrong with it. Rather than whine, ladies should take it upon themselves to put all of their whining energy into positive actions to put an end to whatever they're complaining about [this, after all, is far more productive and also helps build character and respect among mankind]. My female companions should also work to find the good in this world.
I admit that I whine...I complain. But I don't think I complain out of disdain for the world around me; I'm more of a 3 year old girl when I complain. I do think, however, that society kind of fosters this general attitude of whining as the only method for women's voices to be heard. That is, I feel like all whining is a result of something bigger than women themselves--it's almost like whining is expected [case in point, what my mother expected of daughters]. So, it's a perpetual cycle of whining...it's "just what girls do." But I argue that it's NOT what girls should do.
Whining is relatively unproductive in addition to being generally unbecoming and unattractive in almost all serious circumstances [minor whining about things like bothersome boys and annoying habits, in my opinion, is okay and part of what makes a girl a girl]. Perhaps expectations need to change so that whining about important issues is unacceptable at all ages of a girl's life, so that she'll be more productive with her quams with the world and actually do stuff about her complaints. One way of doing so would be to create a supportive environment in which girls are empowered from a young age to embrace their femininity completely, to embrace the beauty of the world completely, and to embrace life itself. This way, girls will have a more positive attitude towards life and, at the same time, come to love being a woman at a much younger age. I imagine that a world full of proudly feminine ladies would have much less whining, because if women truly embraced being women they would express opinions in a more honorable way than whining...they would consciously know that they are better than that. Thus, society needs to change perceptions so that whining is no longer an intrinsically feminine characteristic.
In conclusion, whining is unproductive, unbecoming, unattractive, and basically unladylike---so women should avoid whining [I need to start taking my own advice it seems...this'll be a process]. Essentially, ladies need to stop bitching and start doing something more productive.
[But since whining is so deeply ingrained in our interactions, it'll probably take a while for girls to stop being unduly whiny...bummer]
It is simply a fact that girls whine and complain [at least I do]. Now, I'm not saying that this is a trait only found among females...guys do their fair share of whining as well. The fact of the matter is, though, complaining is a trait much more associated with girls than guys. Why is this? Well, one argument is that it brings attention, and most girls very much enjoy attention [very true]. Another argument is that girls really are just cranky and unhappy [not so true in my opinion]. And yet another argument is that girls don't understand really how else to get their opinions across in a world that has historically denied women any strong voice with which to take a stance.
I tend to think that the reason is a combination of the first and last ones I mentioned. Undeniably, complaining does bring about attention, but I think that complaining for attention should be characteristically associated with girls in their younger years. Growing up with two sisters, complaining about things was an easy way to get my parents to listen to me amongst the never-ending competition to see who could get the most attention [that is, until my parents caught on to my game]. As girls grow into young ladies, I think this childhood cry for attention at a baser level evolves into a more mature cry for a voice in a society that, to many, may seem very misogynistic. Whining and complaining seemingly becomes the "only" way for women to have their voices heard. And I, personally, feel that this expression of complaining/whining as the only mode for change is actually embraced by some extreme feminists who choose to make claims like, "If you're not angry, you're not paying attention." The reality is, though, that such feminist behavioral beliefs undermine genuine concerns and only help support the stereotype of girls being annoyingly whiny.
If women really want to be heard, they will speak rationally and not uphold stereotypes [such as, "women are whiny bitches"]. Ladies need to take a lesson from our male counterparts and stop complaining about things all the time. If you complain all the time, the world soon becomes a terrible place to be because you only see what's wrong with it. Rather than whine, ladies should take it upon themselves to put all of their whining energy into positive actions to put an end to whatever they're complaining about [this, after all, is far more productive and also helps build character and respect among mankind]. My female companions should also work to find the good in this world.
I admit that I whine...I complain. But I don't think I complain out of disdain for the world around me; I'm more of a 3 year old girl when I complain. I do think, however, that society kind of fosters this general attitude of whining as the only method for women's voices to be heard. That is, I feel like all whining is a result of something bigger than women themselves--it's almost like whining is expected [case in point, what my mother expected of daughters]. So, it's a perpetual cycle of whining...it's "just what girls do." But I argue that it's NOT what girls should do.
Whining is relatively unproductive in addition to being generally unbecoming and unattractive in almost all serious circumstances [minor whining about things like bothersome boys and annoying habits, in my opinion, is okay and part of what makes a girl a girl]. Perhaps expectations need to change so that whining about important issues is unacceptable at all ages of a girl's life, so that she'll be more productive with her quams with the world and actually do stuff about her complaints. One way of doing so would be to create a supportive environment in which girls are empowered from a young age to embrace their femininity completely, to embrace the beauty of the world completely, and to embrace life itself. This way, girls will have a more positive attitude towards life and, at the same time, come to love being a woman at a much younger age. I imagine that a world full of proudly feminine ladies would have much less whining, because if women truly embraced being women they would express opinions in a more honorable way than whining...they would consciously know that they are better than that. Thus, society needs to change perceptions so that whining is no longer an intrinsically feminine characteristic.
In conclusion, whining is unproductive, unbecoming, unattractive, and basically unladylike---so women should avoid whining [I need to start taking my own advice it seems...this'll be a process]. Essentially, ladies need to stop bitching and start doing something more productive.
[But since whining is so deeply ingrained in our interactions, it'll probably take a while for girls to stop being unduly whiny...bummer]
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